Friday Funny

One of a series

Last week’s Friday funny (see the link above) reminded me of this. I apologize. I do not have the original news item. It’s from 30 years back, but I can still relate the essentials from memory. It goes like this:

Conroe, Texas (why does this stuff always happen in Texas?). A 72-year old man was arrested for solicitation of prostitution. He had to phone his mother to come and bail him out.

And that is funny. Embarrassing, as well.

Your Friend The Handgun

Nothing new here, folks.

Let me know when you get to feeling safer: ABC News had the story:

Phoenix Police Chief Jeri Williams announced today in a press conference that 23-year-old Aaron Juan Saucedo has been arrested in connection with a string of shootings that resulted in nine deaths.

The shootings took place between August 2015 and July 2016.

According to police, Saucedo was already in jail for the murder of 61-year-old Raul Romero, who was shot multiple times in his driveway in August 2015 and died at a hospital shortly after. Saucedo has been booked on an additional 26 felony counts including homicide.

There is no known correlation between the victims and the suspect, police said. Police added that there may be additional victims out there and they are continuing to investigate.

The Second Amendment works to keep us safe by allowing just about anybody to own a firearm of almost any kind. How is that working out?

Dying to Believe

Some more of the same

It’s now over a year since I started posting these, one each week. If a person were not cautious, a person would conclude that Jesus has an inordinate love for the young and helpless. He takes so many of them under his wing. A previous post marked the sacrifice of young Monica Johnson. Now I mark the passing of her sister:

“What seems to be happening is that the children are doing fine and then they take a turn for the worse very quickly,” said Robert Levenson, director of the Philadelphia Health Department’s division of disease control.

Indeed, after 9-year-old Monica Johnson died last Sunday, a health department doctor visited the other 11 children in the family and, while not permitted to conduct an actual physical exam, found no cause for alarm. But early this morning Monica’s 13-year-old sister, Tina-Louise, died.

Monica, Tina-Louise, plus 9-year-old Karen Still, all died in a measles outbreak associated with, and to the fault of, two fundamentalist Christian churches in Philadelphia in 1991. The New York Times reported then:

Measles and Faith Combine In 5 Deaths in Philadelphia

PHILADELPHIA, Feb. 15— Five children have died in a measles outbreak here in the last 10 days, all of them from families that belong to two fundamentalist churches that preach a reliance on prayer, not medical care, to cure disease.

The churches, the Faith Tabernacle Congregation and the First Century Gospel Church, each run their own schools, which together have about 350 students who have never been inoculated against measles or other diseases.

[Emphasis added]

I have chosen to dribble these deaths out one at a time, week upon week, every Tuesday morning, in order to drive home a point. This problem is not come and gone. It persists. On a daily basis people are using religion as a license to kill—their children. So long as I can obtain the name or death report of a child, or an adult, who has fallen victim to this cultural monstrosity, I will post the details on a Tuesday.

Your Friend The Handgun

Nothing new here, folks.

Modern life can be stressful, what with disappointment, unfulfilled expectations, poor life choices, unexpected reverses. Throughout there is a friend who will never let you down. The Second Amendment ensures American citizens that friend will always be available. As ABC News reports:

A woman is dead and two people are in critical condition after a shooting at an automotive part production plant in Cookeville, Tennessee, this morning, the Putnam County Sheriff’s Office said.

The scene at the Ficosa plant has since been secured and there is no danger to the public, the Cookeville Police Department said.

The woman was the shooter and it appears she took her own life, officials said at a news conference this afternoon.

It’s there when you need it, readers. Don’t leave home without it.

Take note this Tennessee workplace shooting is not to be confused with the Tennessee workplace shooting last year. And may Jesus have mercy on our souls.

Lock Her Up

What goes around…

Yes, it certainly does. ABC World News Tonight With David Muir had the story last night:

Retired Lt. Gen. Michael Flynn was warned by the Pentagon against receiving payments from foreign governments in 2014 after leaving the Defense Intelligence Agency, Rep. Elijah Cummings, D-Md., revealed today.

Cummings, the top Democrat on the House Oversight Committee, released three documents on Flynn, including a letter from the DIA counsel’s office in response to an inquiry from Flynn in October 2014.

The letter, a primer on ethics restrictions that apply to retired military officers, warned that Flynn was prohibited from receiving foreign payments without prior approval, under the emoluments clause of the U.S. Constitution.

“The Pentagon’s warning to Gen. Flynn was bold, italicized and could not have been clearer,” Cummings said at a news conference today.

That General Flynn did not pick up on this legal technicality is mind-numbing, considering he is an expert on criminal intent. As recently as last July he was giving sound legal advice to chanting  crowds.

It certainly does come around, doesn’t it.

Dying to Believe

Some more of the same

Apparently Jesus does save. Saves on the cost of health care. Also the cost of college tuition and the cost of public schooling for children. Because with Jesus you don’t need all this stuff. Because you are by then with Jesus:

Pennsylvania pastor charged in faith-healing death of 2-year-old granddaughter


17 MAR 2017 AT 07:14 ET

A pastor in a fundamentalist Christian sect that rejects doctors and drugs has been charged in the death of a child — his own granddaughter — from medical neglect.

The novel prosecution is raising hopes among some advocates that it might spur change in a church that has resisted it.

Faith Tabernacle Congregation has long told adherents to place their trust in God alone for healing. As a result, dozens of children, mostly in Pennsylvania, have died of preventable and treatable illnesses.

Apparently we have not heard the last of Faith Tabernacle Congregation. Ella Foster has. She is with Jesus now.

Friday Funny

One of a series

Friday at last, and it’s time to shut down the work week with yet another comical criminal. This time it’s Charles Reardon of Great Falls, Montana. Crimefeed.com has the story:

How do we say this diplomatically? Best not to even try. Levi Charles Reardon was dumb enough to “like” his own wanted photo Facebook. When he was featured as a wanted fugitive on the Great Falls / Cascade County Crimestoppers Facebook page, he was compelled to click that thumbs up button.

In April the non-profit posted Reardon’s photo along with a brief description, they even offered a $2,500 reward to the person who had information leading to his arrest. Much to Crime Stopper’s surprise – Reardon responded to the post under his own name. Needless to say, it didn’t take police long to track him down.

I hope it’s not necessary for me to remind you how funny this is.

Friday Funny

One of a series

The above photo was posed for me by a professional actor, who signed a release to allow me to use the image. But it illustrates this week’s case of the funny criminal:

Burglar leaves cellphone at scene, authorities say

August 1, 2014|By Tonya Alanez, Sun Sentinel

Forgetfulness landed a burglar behind bars, police say.

After Wayne Wade, 46, broke into a Hollywood home, he left his cellphone on the victim’s bed, they say.

When Wade called to retrieve it, a police officer on scene heard it ringing and answered. Wade told the cop his name and said he needed his phone back, according to a police report a judge read from in court.

Fingerprint evidence from the phone has tied Wade to five other burglaries, Broward County Judge John “Jay” Hurley said.

Funny for us. Not so much so for Wayne. Check back next Friday for more.

Dying to Believe

Some more of the same

Worse news, Jesus is not the only one ready to do us in. All that is required is a dim bulb upstairs:

An as yet unidentified “holistic” practitioner negligently kills a young woman with IV turmeric (yes, intravenous)

It was only just yesterday that I recounted the story of a naturopathic quack in Bowling Green, KY who told a cancer patient that “chemo is for losers,” promising her that he [would] eliminate her tumor within three months. She listened to him, and as a result she died, as she and her husband were suing the quack. Not long after, her distraught widower walked into the quack’s office on a Friday evening earlier this month and, if the police charges are accurate, shot him dead. Basically, because this quack convinced the woman to [forgo] chemotherapy, whatever chance of survival she had was eliminated. The woman’s name was Fikreta Ibrisevic; the quack’s name was Juan Gonzalez; and the name of the widower allegedly turned killer is Omer Ahmetovic.

Sleep softly. Somewhere Jesus is waiting.

Friday Funny

One of a series

Wow! Have I been  doing this for an entire year? This is Friday Funny number 52,  and it’s another stupid crook funny:

A Drug Dealer Tells a Customer He’s “Too Smart” to Get Caught . . . and the Customer Is an Undercover Cop

There’s nothing as perfect as an idiot criminal who THINKS he’s a genius criminal . . . and that’s EXACTLY what we’ve got here. 45-year-old Adalberto Ramiro-diaz of Port St. Lucie, Florida has been running a pretty massive drug dealing operation out of his house. At one point recently, a customer was over at his house looking at his massive stash of drugs and guns, and asked him how he’d never been caught.  And Adalberto told him he was TOO SMART to get caught. But the customer he told that to was . . . an undercover cop. The cops arrested him last week on a ton of drug and weapons charges.  They also found a fake FBI badge in his house during their search.

When they’re not dangerous, stupid crooks can be funny. Try not to be funny like Adalberto. He was too funny.