Bad Movie of the Week

One of a series

Looking for another Bad Movie of the Week, so I turned (again) to Amazon Prime Video. This is a sci-fi feature straight out of Saturday morning TV. It’s about a world catastrophe involving rising ocean levels, and they needed a title. After much soul-searching they settled on Oceans Rising. Wikipedia doesn’t have an entry, so details are from IMDb. It was released last year by The Asylum and others.

Jason Tobias is Josh, and Summer Spiro is Pam. They are scientists, married to each other and  working for the government. Things are going badly for them, as Pam’s embryo transplant has failed to take, and the couple are facing life without children. However, said life promises to  be short, as the world is going to hell on the fast track.

The Earth’s magnetic field is flipping, and that is causing chaos for all concerned. Offices in Washington, where the two work, are by the hour rocked by earthquakes, and solar storms wreak havoc with satellites and the world’s power grid, due to the vanishing magnetic field. Polar ice is melting, oceans are rising, and tidal waves frequently invade the land.

Josh has a solution, but nobody will listen to him, and his violent outbursts only make matters worse for him in the government bureaucracy, and in his marriage to Pam. He throws the whole business over and moves to Texas, Galveston in particular. Josh has chosen Galveston, because those people appreciate what rising oceans can do.

Josh has acquired a boat, and he is stocking it for survival. Meanwhile, Pam comes to the realization that the peaks of power are in gridlock and unable to address the matter. She quits, hops a plane to Galveston, and arrives just in time to help Josh stash provisions on the boat.

It’s none too soon, for minutes after Pam’s arrival the big one comes, and the Gulf of Mexico rises up and swamps the whole place. Josh and Pam barely have time to unhitch the boat before the water comes.

They motor about in a Waterworld, searching for survivors to take aboard. They find an adequate number.

Quickly there is crew enough to engage on Josh’s quest to save the world. He must get to Brookhaven Labs, because Josh will use the accelerator there to generate a mini-black hole. His task also requires getting to CERN, where he will create a matching black hole. The two in combination will stop the magnetic pole reversal.

Josh figures Brookhaven is going to be above water since it was skillfully constructed on the highest point on Long Island, 98 feet above sea level. When the boat arrives they discover two soldiers shouldering the task of shoring up sandbag dikes around the installation. Josh leave Pam in charge of a crew to do the rescue work and also to engineer the black hole.

Josh and the rest of his crew head across the Atlantic Ocean and arrive in France, in the foothills of the Alps, still above water. They hijack an abandoned van and head for CERN.

There Josh works with Dr. Zicree (Paul Statman) to get another black hole going. The two black holes need to be synchronized for this to work, so Josh and Pam throw the starter switches at the same time.

It’s a beauty to behold, as charged particles zip around inside the accelerators.

And there is success, but when time comes to shut down both accelerators, the Brookhaven engine will not switch off. Pam saves the world by taking an ax to the power cable, but then falls lifeless from the electric jolt. Josh looks forward to a world saved, but without Pam.

Miracle of miracles! Pam revives, and everybody is happy. Except, I imagine, all those who were caught up in the ocean flooding.

Yes, pretty hokey. We know what it looks like when the oceans walk up onto the land. We all saw the videos from Indonesia in 2004. The disaster scene has the appearance of being shot in some quiet lagoon. The views of sub-atomic particles zipping around the colliders are fun to watch but a definite piece of imaginary thinking. We see Josh’s boat supposed to be making 30 knots across the Atlantic, but from all appearances the boat is idling at less than 10 in somebody’s lake. Much imagination is required to make this believable.

One thought on “Bad Movie of the Week

  1. Pingback: Bad Movie of the Week | Skeptical Analysis

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