Four Weeks In

Number 37 of a series

politics-trumpinnercircleputin

The drip goes on. Daniel Dale, with the Washington bureau of The Star, compiled a list of 80 fabrications by the Snowflake-in-Chief, all during the first four weeks of the new administration. Here is number 37:

37. Feb. 4, 2017 — Twitter

The repeated claim: “After being forced to apologize for its bad and inaccurate coverage of me after winning the election, the FAKE NEWS @nytimes is still lost!”

In fact: The New York Times not only wasn’t “forced” to apologize for its coverage, it did not apologize at all. Trump was referring to a post-election letter, a kind of sales pitch, in which Times leaders thanked readers and said they planned to “rededicate ourselves to the fundamental mission of Times journalism.”

La de da de da, indeed! He is the dictionary definition of fact-deprivation. How long can he keep this up? Better yet, how long am I going to keep this up?

Until there is no skin left.

Bad Movie of the Week

One of a series

Last week  this column featured The Shadow Strikes, featuring Rod La Rocque as Lamont Cranston/The Shadow.  This is Behind the Mask, another in the five or so featuring The Shadow. It stars Kane Richmond as Lamont Cranston (The Shadow) and Barbara Read as Margo Lane, Cranston’s main squeeze. The Shadow Strikes came out in 1937, and this one followed in 1946. The big difference is in the improvement in cinematography and acting, but not much else. The story is still lame, a comedy of murder and mayhem. We are going to see people dropping dead all over accompanied by loads of laughs.

This is from Monogram Pictures (what else). Details are from Wikipedia and IMDb.

Opening scenes show shady reporter Jeff Mann (James Cardwell) making the rounds for his sideline operation (blackmail). A hundred here, a few hundred there, and people’s names won’t appear in his column. Here he muscles sumptuous gambling operator Mae Bishop (Marjorie Hoshelle). With each visit the eager Mr. Mann drops word that his fees are going up.

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And that’s the end of the sleazy reporter. Back at his office at the newspaper a shadowy figure comes in through the window behind him. The first his co-workers notice anything wrong they see an ominous silhouette on Mann’s office window. It’s The Shadow, they are sure of it.

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Meanwhile, the real Shadow, Lamont Cranston, is making cuddle bunnies with his fiancée, Margo Lane. They are going to be married the next day.

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It goes downhill from  there. This has nothing to offer by way of a plot. Cranston, both as himself and as The Shadow, bumbles his way through the case of mounting bodies. Here he deals with some officers of the law.

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Here Cranston has lured Edith Merrill (June Clyde) up to his place, the idea being to schmooze her and get her to lead him to an important source of evidence. Unfortunately girlfriend Margo and girlfriend’s girlfriend arrive first, and Cranston’s butler, Shrevvie  (George Chandler), hides them behind the couch just in time as Miss Merrill arrives. Here the two are listening with increasing agitation as Cranston makes progress of various kinds.

It’s all very comical, but that’s the last we see of the lovely Edith. As she exits and takes the elevator down a shadowy figure is waiting and grabs her from behind.

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On another occasion The Shadow attempts to penetrate a suspect’s fortified position and tangles with three of his henchmen. He defeats the three through the application of John Barrymore gymnastics and Shrevvie wielding a pair of Indian clubs (they are in a gymnasium).

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Of course it all comes to an end when Cranston gets the host of suspects together at the newspaper office and reveals the mystery killer.

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What this has over and beyond last Sunday’s bad movie is a hint at direction and cinematography. Settings and shots are more realistic, and the action moves, comparatively. Vis, the stiffness rampant last Sunday:

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Some of these movies are available to watch free on YouTube:

The Shadow Strikes

The Shadow Returns

But I’m guessing not this one. I will have a review of The Shadow Returns some Sunday in the future. Not soon.

Four Weeks In

Number 36 of a series

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The drip goes on. Daniel Dale, with the Washington bureau of The Star, compiled a list of 80 fabrications by the Snowflake-in-Chief, all during the first four weeks of the new administration. Here is number 36:

36. Feb. 3, 2017 — Twitter

The claim: “Thank you to Prime Minister of Australia for telling the truth about our very civil conversation that FAKE NEWS media lied about.”

In fact: The media did not lie about their phone call, which was not civil. A senior Trump official acknowledged to the Washington Post that it had been “hostile and charged,” and prominent news outlets in both countries reported that Trump had berated Malcolm Turnbull. Turnbull denied that Trump had “hung up” on him, but he did not deny that the call had ended abruptly after 25 minutes, as the Post reported. “Was it cut short?” an Australian radio host pressed Turnbull. “The call ended courteously. That’s all I want to say about that,” Turnbull responded.

La de da de da, indeed! He is the dictionary definition of fact-deprivation. How long can he keep this up? Better yet, how long am I going to keep this up?

Until there is no skin left.

Bad Joke of the Week

One of a continuing series

Mother of Jesus, please come back.

The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, “You don’t know Jack Schitt.” Now you can intellectually handle the situation.

Jack is the son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack schitt married Noe Schitt, the deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents’ objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.

However, after being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried to Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.

She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken  Schitt. Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseperable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.

The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to  tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

So now when someone says, “You don’t know Jack Schitt,” you can correct them.

Uncle Bye-Bye

Yes, it is a continuing series.

Forget about Uncle Kim Jong-un. Your real daddy-longarms is Russian President For As Long As He Sees Fit Vladimir Putin. From ABC News:

A former Russian lawmaker who became a vociferous critic of Moscow following his recent move to Ukraine was shot and killed Thursday in Kiev, prompting harsh words between the two neighboring countries.

Denis Voronenkov, who had testified to Ukrainian investigators and criticized Russian policies after his move to Kiev last fall, was shot dead by an unidentified gunman near the entrance of an upscale hotel in the Ukrainian capital.

Voronenkov’s bodyguard, a Ukrainian security services officer charged with protecting him, fired back during the attack and was himself seriously wounded.

Ukrainian officials said the gunman, who they claimed was a Ukrainian citizen, later died from wounds in his chest and head. They did not identify the gunman.

Talk about a long reach, Vlad the Embalmer can outreach with the best. His reach may extend to our own shores.

Continuing from the video:

George Stephanopoulos: What exactly is your relationship with Vladimir Putin?

Trump: I have no relationship with Putin.

Stephanopoulos: But if you have no relationship with Putin, then why did you say in 2013 “I do have a relationship,” In 2014…

Trump: He has said nice things about me over the years…

Stephanopoulos: But you said for three years, 13, 14, 15, that you did have a relationship.

Trump: What do you call a relationship?

Don. Don! People are not saying you slept with the guy. But what do you call a relationship? Another video clip elaborates:

Interviewer: Do you have a relationship with Vladimir Putin, a conversational relationship, anything that you feel that you have sway…?

Trump: I do have a relationship.

Yes, Donald, that’s what we mean when we say you have a relationship with Vlad the Embalmer. It’s when you say in a news interview that you have a relationship, that’s when you have a relationship. Otherwise you would be a liar, and nobody wants to call you a liar. Yet.

So, Mr. President, before you consider breaking off this love fest, or whatever you have going on, with Uncle Bye Bye, think about that long reach.

Four Weeks In

Number 35 of a series

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The drip goes on. Daniel Dale, with the Washington bureau of The Star, compiled a list of 80 fabrications by the Snowflake-in-Chief, all during the first four weeks of the new administration. Here is number 35:

35. Feb. 2, 2017 — Facebook and Twitter

The claim: “’Trump taps first woman to CIA second in command’.”

In fact: Trump’s appointee, Gina Haspel, is the second female CIA deputy director, not the first: Barack Obama appointed Avril Haines to that post. Trump was quoting an inaccurate headline in The Hill newspaper — it was soon changed — but the president does not get a pass when publicizing inaccurate claims about his own administration, even if he did not make them up himself.

La de da de da, indeed! He is the dictionary definition of fact-deprivation. How long can he keep this up? Better yet, how long am I going to keep this up?

Until there is no skin left.

Friday Funny

One of a series

Wow! Have I been  doing this for an entire year? This is Friday Funny number 52,  and it’s another stupid crook funny:

A Drug Dealer Tells a Customer He’s “Too Smart” to Get Caught . . . and the Customer Is an Undercover Cop

There’s nothing as perfect as an idiot criminal who THINKS he’s a genius criminal . . . and that’s EXACTLY what we’ve got here. 45-year-old Adalberto Ramiro-diaz of Port St. Lucie, Florida has been running a pretty massive drug dealing operation out of his house. At one point recently, a customer was over at his house looking at his massive stash of drugs and guns, and asked him how he’d never been caught.  And Adalberto told him he was TOO SMART to get caught. But the customer he told that to was . . . an undercover cop. The cops arrested him last week on a ton of drug and weapons charges.  They also found a fake FBI badge in his house during their search.

When they’re not dangerous, stupid crooks can be funny. Try not to be funny like Adalberto. He was too funny.

Bat Shit Crazy

Tenth of a series

It’s a good thing none of that stuff is still going around:

This West Virginia school district has weekly Bible classes. A kindergartner is suing.

March 22

A kindergartner is battling county officials in federal court over Bible classes in public school.

In a federal lawsuit filed in January, Jane Doe, a pseudonymous plaintiff who is the mother of Mercer County, W.Va., kindergartner Jamie Doe, challenged the county’s “Bible in the Schools” program, saying it was unconstitutional.

“This program advances and endorses one religion, improperly entangles public schools in religious affairs, and violates the personal consciences of nonreligious and non-Christian parents and students,” said the lawsuit, filed in U.S. District Court for the Southern District of West Virginia.

The story, featured in The Washington Post yesterday, further describes idiotic themes promoted by the Mercer Counter public school system. According to the Post report, a lesson contained the following language: “imagine that human beings and dinosaurs existed at the same time.” It continued: “So picture Adam being able to crawl up on the back of a dinosaur!” Additionally: “He and Eve could have their own personal water slide! Wouldn’t that be so wild!”

Yes, this public school is cool with the idea of passing on to students the false tale of Adam and Eve from the biblical book of Genesis. Additionally these public servants want to tell students that, contrary to known facts, people and dinosaurs existed contemporaneously. An item appearing on the Patheos blog provides additional detail:

Bible indoctrination classes have been taught in Mercer County Schools for more than 75 years. Between 1939 and 1985, the bible classes were designed, financed, administered and staffed by a small group of Mercer County citizens. Following complaints by parents of eight students in 1985, the Mercer County schools took over the instruction in 1986, claiming to follow nine guidelines from the Office of the Attorney General.

Financing is provided by the “Bluefield Bible Study Fund, Inc.,” which operates a fund to pay bible teachers to instruct about 4,000 students. Bible teachers must follow lesson plans almost without deviation. There are 70 to 90 visuals used in each lesson. Lessons have included images of Jesus being tortured, nailed to the cross, and ascending into heaven.

Public schools can teach a host of ideas, but the idea of a person ascending into the sky while people look on is the far side of truth. Where did all this start? Where is it going to end? Are chemistry students going to learn everything is composed of four basic elements—fire, water, earth, and air? Will history classes get into the details of the lost city of Atlantis? Will science classes describe how the sun goes around the Earth? The Post item paints a dismal picture:

One mother in Mercer County said her child was indeed bullied for not attending the Bible classes. In fact, the bullying got so bad that Elizabeth Deal took her daughter out of the county school system, she said.

“I think this is definitely an outright gray area, if not outright illegal,” Deal said.

The school district’s motion also pointed out that the classes, which are paid for by a nonprofit organization, receive no public funding.

“The point of the course is to teach history and literature … a cultural enrichment objective,” said Hiram S. Sasser, a lawyer representing Mercer County Public Schools who works for the First Liberty Institute, a Texas-based nonprofit focused on religious freedom. “To make sure that students obviously have the social currency to interpret Western literature.”

“The point of the course is to teach history and literature … a cultural enrichment objective.” Really? When did teaching history turn into teaching fables as true? Are students to be left believing Pecos Bill and Paul Bunyan were true-to-life and their exploits real? Is Washington Irving‘s The Legend of Sleepy Hollow to be elevated to the status of a historical narrative? When did “cultural enrichment” become indoctrination? At what point do we need to stand back and call this what it is, Bat Shit Crazy?

[Full disclosure: I am a member of the Freedom From Religion Foundation.]

Four Weeks In

Number 34 of a series

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The drip goes on. Daniel Dale, with the Washington bureau of The Star, compiled a list of 80 fabrications by the Snowflake-in-Chief, all during the first four weeks of the new administration. Here is number 34:

34. Feb. 2, 2017 — Facebook

The claim: “Smart! ‘Kuwait issues its own Trump-esque visa ban for five Muslim-majority countries.’”

In fact: Kuwait imposed no such ban. The Kuwaiti government later told its state news agency that it “categorically denies these claims,” and representatives of countries supposedly affected, like Pakistan, also said the story was wrong. Trump was sharing a link to an entirely inaccurate headline from the Jordanian website Al Bawaba, not making it up himself, but the president does not get a pass for promoting false information.

La de da de da, indeed! How long can he keep this up? Better yet, how long am I going to keep this up?

Until there is no skin left.

Your Friend The Handgun

Nothing new here, folks.

Don’t you feel safer already? Some assembly required:

Person accidentally shot while being shown gun in Rowan Co.

Wednesday, March 8th 2017, 4:16 pm CSTWednesday, March 8th 2017, 6:08 pm CST