Don’t Bump The Trump

One of a series

politics-trumpleastqualified

A warning for those who chance to meet a wild Trump coming home late at night, past a graveyard, all alone in a storm: Don’t bump the Trump. [With apologies to Shel Silverstein.]

Previously I aimed this series of posts at the humor of a narcissistic businessman vying for a job that requires more than an ounce of real character. Now I’m leaving the high road and will be calling things as they are. In the meantime, I have this to say. Thank you, Mr. Trump. It’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever done for me.Thank you very, very, very much!

Self-obsessed billionaire Donald Trump earlier snatched the campaign torch from the Republican Party by scooping up conservative America’s low-hanging fruit. Full disclosure: it’s something I proclaimed over a year ago could not be done. I was wrong! How wrong? Very wrong. When you pick Donald Trump over Hillary Clinton, you get much more. How much more? For starters, you get a someone who:

  • Mocked a man with disabilities.
  • Attacked the parents of a fallen American hero.
  • Belittled POWs and the war record of Senator John McCain.
  • Lied about how much money he raised for veterans.
  • Called a former Miss Universe “disgusting” and fat, telling his Twitter followers to find her non-existent sex tape.
  • Accused an American-born federal judge of being unfit to do his job because of his Mexican heritage.
  • Likely avoided paying taxes for nearly two decades.
  • Called most Mexican immigrants rapists and criminals, even though that’s not remotely factual.
  • Lied about seeing “thousands and thousands” of Muslims celebrating in New Jersey on 9/11.
  • Lied about getting a letter from the NFL complaining about the debate schedule.
  • Tried to exploit the death of an African American woman in Chicago to say that’s why black voters will support him.
  • Found the “bright side” to tragedies because his poll numbers tend to go up.
  • Settled with the Department of Justice after his company was found guilty of racially discriminating against minorities.
  • Has cheated on at least one wife.
  • Was just discovered on video admitting that he not only tried to cheat on his current wife, but he attempted to do so with another married woman.
  • Had his first wife publicly say that he did nothing when it came to raising their children until they were old enough to talk business.
  • Tweeted that women should have expected to be sexually assaulted when they mixed males and females together in the military.
  • Said he wants to target the families of terrorists.
  • Stated that he wants to ban an entire religion.
  • Praised a Russian president who obviously hates the U.S. and Americans.
  • Encouraged the Russian government to commit espionage against Americans.
  • Insinuated that another Republican’s wife was ugly.
  • Tried to implicate another Republican’s father in JFK’s assassination.
  • Sought out the help of former Fox News CEO Roger Ailes after he was fired following multiple allegations that he had sexually harassed women for years.
  • Made Breitbart’s Steve Bannon one of his top campaign people.
  • Had a former campaign manager abruptly resign after a report came out linking him to pro-Russian groups that were directly trying to undermine U.S. policy in eastern Europe.
  • Called Carly Fiorina ugly.
  • Has said climate change was a hoax created by the Chinese — then denied saying it.
  • Was a leading conspiracy theorist when it came to the racist-driven birther conspiracies against President Obama.
  • Dismissed nearly eight years of accusing the president of not being an American with a less than 30 second statement where he didn’t apologize for any of it.
  • Tried to blame Hillary Clinton for his racism.
  • Re-tweeted anti-African American propaganda created by a white supremacy group.
  • Played dumb about knowing who former Grand Wizard of the KKK David Duke was.
  • Skipped a presidential debate because he was scared of a moderator.
  • Has, on several occasions, suggested he finds his daughter attractive.
  • Called a husband doing things like changing diapers and helping with the children, a man “trying to be the wife.”
  • Has said he wants more countries to have nuclear weapons.
  • Said he can’t release his tax returns because they’re currently being audited — even though the IRS said that’s a lie.
  • Feels he has the right to sexually assault women.

 

Is that all, you may ask? My apologies. There’s more:

  • Operated a fraudulent “university,” bilking hundreds of students, some out of thousands of dollars.
  • Operated a fraudulent charitable foundation, using it to funnel money to his own use.
  • Made campaign contributions to Texas and Florida attorneys general who dropped plans to prosecute him for the university fraud.
  • Stiffed a company that sold him $100 thousand dollars worth of pianos, paying him only 70 cents on the dollar.
  • Stiffed employees, not paying what was owed in regular and overtime wages until compelled by legal action.

Clinton is going to have to get busy really soon if she ever expects to pull even with Donald Trump.

Yeah, it’s game on. We are going to have more fun between now and November. We can be assured Donald Trump will never fail to entertain us.

Continue reading. And may Jesus have mercy on your soul.

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One thought on “Don’t Bump The Trump

  1. Pingback: Don’t Bump The Trump | Skeptical Analysis

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