Don’t Bump The Trump

One of a series

Home invasion by burglar concept

Home invasion by burglar concept

A warning for those who chance to meet a wild Trump coming home late at night, past a graveyard, all alone in a storm: Don’t bump the Trump. [With apologies to Shel Silverstein.]

Previously I aimed this series of posts at the humor of a narcissistic businessman vying for a job that requires more than an ounce of real character. Now I’m leaving the high road and will be calling things as they are. In the meantime, I have this to say. Thank you, Mr. Trump. It’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever done for me.Thank you very, very, very much!

Self-obsessed billionaire Donald Trump earlier snatched the campaign torch from the Republican Party by scooping up conservative America’s low-hanging fruit. Full disclosure: it’s something I proclaimed over a year ago could not be done. I was wrong! How wrong? Very wrong. Who would have though a candidate could live so long on a diet of deceit:

“We pay approximately 73 percent of the cost of NATO. It’s a lot of money to protect other people. But I’m all for NATO.” — Donald Trump

Trump is wrong, the U.S. doesn’t pay 73 percent of NATO’s operational budget. The United States pays just over 22 percent of the cost of NATO’s spending. Trump is confusing the numbers. President Barack Obama has also urged other NATO member-states to up their defense spending.

All right, folks. It can’t be as bad as everybody claims. I mean the assertion that Donald Trump lies every three minutes cannot be confirmed. This is something that requires Skeptical Analysis. Here is the awful truth.

First, the three minutes claim is way off base. Best research shows it’s more like every four and a half minutes. It’s a shame to watch a billionaire-turned-candidate’s quest for additional fame and wealth stymied by vicious lies about his character. I mean, that extra one and a half minutes marks the difference between a gentleman and a bum. No gentleman, least of all a man the stature of The Donald, can come up with a new lie every three minutes. Scientific research shows it takes a gentleman on average 4.5 minutes to concoct a new lie. Of course, Donald Trump possesses powers unavailable to the average gentleman.

So, Hillary, take them facts back to Arkansas and bury them with your murdered commie fellow travelers.

Yeah, it’s game on. We are going to have more fun between now and November. We can be assured Donald Trump will never fail to entertain us.

Continue reading. And may Jesus have mercy on your soul.


One thought on “Don’t Bump The Trump

  1. Pingback: Don’t Bump The Trump | Skeptical Analysis

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