Don’t Bump The Trump

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A warning for those who chance to meet a wild Trump coming home late at night, past a graveyard, all alone in a storm: Don’t bump the Trump. [With apologies to Shel Silverstein.]

I’ve been running this love fest with presidential candidate Donald Trump for over four weeks with no idea where it’s heading. Now I find I will be able to post a new item every day from now until November without repeating myself. Thank you, Mr. Trump. It’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever done for me. Thank you very, very, very much!

Self-obsessed billionaire Donald Trump earlier snatched the campaign torch from the Republican Party by scooping up conservative America’s low-hanging fruit. Full disclosure: it’s something I proclaimed over a year ago could not be done. I was wrong! How wrong? Very wrong. I completely failed to take into account Donald Trump’s squeaky clean criminal record:

(CNN) — New York’s attorney general, who is leading a lawsuit against Trump University there, made his view of the case clear on Thursday: “It’s fraud. This is straight up fraud.”

Eric Schneiderman laced into presumptive Republican nominee Donald Trump over the suit during an appearance on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe,” repeatedly describing the businessman as dishonest and manipulative in his role with the now-defunct program.
“The law is very clear. The law protects the gullible as well as the sophisticated. As we’ve seen over the course of the last year, there are a lot of people who fall for Mr. Trump’s promises and rhetoric,” Schneiderman said.

“Straight up fraud?” Let’s not go overboard Mr. Schneiderman. I mean, just because some people felt a little grifted after indulging in one of Donald Trump’s many enterprises, that doesn’t mean Trump is going to need to go to jail. I mean, jail is only for poor people. Right? Like those who allowed themselves to get shafted.

Besides, Donald Trump, himself, was not personally involved:

The ads for his university were classic Donald Trump — Trump stares into the camera and proclaims:

“We’re going to have professors and adjunct professors that are absolutely terrific people, terrific brains, successful. We are going to have the best of the best… and these are people that are handpicked by me.”

But a CNN investigation finds that Trump and others involved in the school admitted under oath that some promises made to students just didn’t happen.

In Trump’s own deposition this past December, Trump failed to recognize the name of a single presenter or teacher at his real estate seminars. He also confirmed he had nothing to do with the selection process of instructors who taught at the school’s events or mentors for the school’s “Gold Elite” programs.

A review of Trump University presenters and so-called real estate experts found many with questionable credentials and inflated resumes. Court documents show background-checks conducted during the hiring process could not determine whether some instructors even graduated high school.

Next step: President of the United States.

Thank you, Mr. Trump. Thank you very, very, very much.

Yeah, it’s game on. We are going to have more fun between now and November. We can be assured Donald Trump will never fail to entertain us.

Continue reading. And may Jesus have mercy on your soul.

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One thought on “Don’t Bump The Trump

  1. Pingback: Don’t Bump The Trump | Skeptical Analysis

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