Strange Bible

godbible

It’s a strange book. Some people read it religiously, every day even. Do any of them notice what  Jim Walker has? The Bible is a strange and conflicted work. He’s put up some of these peculiarities on NoBeliefs.com. Bible quotes are blue:

The Back Parts of God

“And the LORD spake unto Moses face to face, as a man speaketh unto his friend…” (Exodus 33:11)

“And he said, Thou canst not see my face: for there shall no man see me, and live. And the LORD said, Behold, there is a place by me, and thou shalt stand upon a rock: and it shall come to pass, while my glory passeth by, that I will put thee in a cleft of the rock, and will cover thee with my hand while I pass by: and I will take away mine hand, and thou shalt see my back parts; but my face shall not be seen.” (Exodus 33:20-23)

Comment

In verse 11 we read that God spoke to Moses, face-to-face. Yet in seeming contradiction, we have later God telling Moses that he cannot see His face. Instead, God decides to show Moses his back parts! “Back parts” of course serves as a euphemism for “ass”. In other words, God here says to Moses “thou shalt see my ass.”

I’ll leave it to the readers to ponder the possible sexual orientation of God as he shows Moses his bare bottom.

See what I mean? Some of this stuff doesn’t make sense. Of course I’m kidding. Most of it doesn’t make sense, but today is Sunday, and I’m in a generous mood.

There’s more:

The Brethren Of Jesus

“After this he went down to Capernaum, he, and his mother, and his brethren, and his disciples: and they continued there not many days.” (John 2:12)

Comment

This verse describes Jesus and his brethren. Jesus Christ’s blood-related siblings directly contradicts the Catholic concept of the life-long virginity of the mother Mary. Some Christians have attempted to defend this contradiction by pointing out that brethren has two meanings: it could mean brothers, from the same parents, or it could mean colleagues or friends. Note, however, that the use of the word “disciples” suggests that brothers and disciples constitute two separate groups. Therefore, brethren must mean brothers in this context.

Note also that Mark 6:3 mentions brothers and sisters that can only mean blood siblings.

Also, nowhere in the Gospel of John or Mark does it mention Jesus’ birth or Mary as a virgin. Considering that a virgin birth of the Son of God would seem of utmost importance, it appears rather odd that these Gospels do not mention it.

Not I, but others have spake wicked words about Christianity. OK, I cannot tell a lie. I have spake these words, as well. Some such words are that 2000 years ago a bunch of people started a world-wide religious movement just to save one girl’s reputation.

More seriously, what I’m getting at is this—a woman (girl) can no longer be considered a virgin having once given birth. The hymen will be truly and forever broken. Can we all settle on that?

Walker has posted 31 such entries to this remarkable page. My advice to you, religious and others alike, get out your Bible. And read it. You don’t even to purchase a Bible if you don’t already have one. Multiple presentations are on-line for all to read, and free e-books are available, including a Kindle edition, which I have. No laughing, please.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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